How to become the life of the party

The soul of the company is the “engine of fun”, which turns on those around him, puts them in a cheerful mood, talks a lot and listens a lot, and can find a relationship with everyone. common language And general theme for conversation. How to become such a person?

1. Be a little more flexible. We all change our behavior depending on the situation: at school or work we behave this way, with our parents this way, with friends this way, alone with ourselves... It's normal when we behave differently. Don't always try to be yourself - you will only torture yourself. If you have mastered a new role for yourself, you have not changed yourself, your life has simply become even more multifaceted. Don't tell yourself that you will never be the life of the party. There is no such gene in a person - “the soul of the party.”

2. Dream a little. What will happen if you become the soul of any company? Will you be a part of many parties? Will you make new friends? Will you have ardent fans? Decide for yourself how much you really want to be the life of the party.

3. Get into the role gradually. There is no need to rush. As they say, if you hurry, you will make people laugh.

4. Overcome communication barriers. There is such a good phrase: “Knock and it will be opened to you.” This does not mean that everyone will open their doors to you. This means that it is stupid to stand under the door and wait for it to open by itself. If you have something to say to a person, just come up and say it. Learn to start talking to people you haven’t talked to before: classmates, co-workers, just random people.

5. Understand the meaning of parties. Here, by get-together we mean any joint activity of the company: a party, a joint trip to a cafe, etc. As a rule, parties are organized for joint recreation and entertainment. IN fun company a person rests differently than alone or with someone else. In the company you can arrange, say, a game of football or dancing. Other important feature is rooted in our instincts: when everyone around is having fun, then we have fun too, we stop feeling danger, our anxiety and other unpleasant sensations are relieved. Moreover, in a cheerful, friendly company we feel that we are loved, and this is also very important. Observe different parties yourself, try to find their meanings.

6. In a cheerful company everyone is equal. People are designed in such a way that they do not like being bossed around. It is especially unpleasant when random people (not bosses) command. Therefore on fun party there is no need to command anyone. If they boss you around, don’t be offended, make it a joke. If someone tries to command someone, then, due to the possibilities of the situation, also turn it into a joke. Nobody forces anyone to do anything.

7. Don't be boring. Don't educate anyone, don't lecture. Don’t tell anyone, for example, that he has to go home, that he has to go to work tomorrow, that he shouldn’t pester married woman etc.

8. Don't be offended. Did someone accidentally step on their foot? Even if it hurts a lot, overcome the offense, don’t let your offender feel awkward. Turn your offense into a joke. You can, for example, say something like this: “Now you owe me. You will dance with me next dance.”

9. Be creative. If possible, come up with some new joint entertainment. If you see that the company is a little depressed, offer, for example, to play forfeits: “When I lived in a hostel, we often played forfeits in groups. Once upon a time like this funny incident happened..."

10. Pay attention to everyone. It is better to talk a lot and with different people. Ideally, everyone should hear at least one pleasant word from you. However, if someone comes to you with a serious question, take time for him, do not spare your fun for him.

11. You joke a lot. Tell jokes different cases from life. Arrange funny pranks, games.

12. Be brave. You are with certain people in ordinary life avoid physical contact - come into contact with him at a fun party. Don't be afraid to compliment people, praise other people. Don’t be afraid to look funny or ridiculous - at a party this will be your highlight.

It happens that we really want to somehow stand out in the company of our friends and girlfriends, we want to become at least a little brighter and more interesting, so that they pay more attention to us than to others. It’s very nice to feel that everyone is happy about your appearance, and communicating with you gives your friends pleasure. Is it possible to learn this, or is it not accessible to everyone? And if you can still learn, then how to become the soul of the party, what traits do you need to develop in yourself for this?

We noted at the very beginning that in order to be in the center of attention, you need to be brighter and more interesting. We all value meeting interesting people, and most of us hope that others find it fun to interact with us too. In any case, it makes sense to work on yourself to become a truly interesting person. And we will try to help you with this.

Who can be called an interesting person?

What makes someone more interesting than other people? Answering this question is not always easy. There are many subjective points of view that are difficult to apply to everyone, especially when we're talking about about personality qualities. But there is also common features, which are noted in people of this type:

• Ability to take risks. We all have to solve some problems. But no one pays special attention for a person who always prefers safe, easy way. A person who is capable of extraordinary decisions and actions always risks something; but he gets some new memorable experience that adds new facet into his personality.

Our life is full of examples of people who play only safe games with fate. They live a measured life, without pretending to be anything better. Of course, these are not at all the people we usually hear or talk about. Those who are talked about usually do something that no one has done before, or achieve something despite all the difficulties. When doing something extraordinary, we always face an element of risk. Whether we are starting our own business, writing our first book, or doing other similar things, we take risks. We devote ourselves to some hobby - tourism, alpine skiing, parkour or collecting Teddy bears - this also has its share of risk. Just try to buy and wear a super fashionable dress - don’t you risk running into ridicule from those around you who don’t understand anything about fashion trends? One thing is clear: interesting people are not at all the type of people who are all their own. free time They sit quietly at home, spending every evening in front of the TV or computer monitor. The latter will clearly never understand how to become the life of the party. They most likely don’t even have any company!

• Curiosity. By the way, this is one of the catalysts for taking risks. If you are interested in learning about bullfighting in Spain, then you have a much better chance of going there. Curiosity makes us explore the world and look for our place in it. It forces us to leave the position of passive observer to become more active. In addition, curiosity is key to developing imagination, as some best ideas come when we simply give free rein to our imagination.
• Own opinion on various issues. Actually, every person is capable of expressing an opinion on one issue or another. But a bright, extraordinary person is distinguished by the fact that his point of view on many things is often unique, inherent in him. If you only repeat what others say, then you will not say anything new or interesting. The same goes for those people who are afraid to express their opinion. Each person has the right to his own judgment, and it is quite natural that worldviews different people may vary significantly. But if you keep your views to yourself for fear that they will not be popular or will lead to conflict, then this will make you boring and predictable.
• The ability to make your presence known. This requires your self-confidence, expressive language body, the ability to interact in society. This is not prerequisite in order to become an interesting person, but it really helps to become just that. Imagine, for example, that you are watching a rock band perform live. If musicians go on stage and just play and sing, without showing any emotions and hardly moving, then you will become bored at this concert, even if the songs they sing are not bad. When are you interested? When artists cry and laugh on stage, move and dance, and colored lights dynamically flash, shimmer and circle around them.

The ability to stay in company and interact with its members can set you apart from others. There are people who know how to talk about even everyday, everyday things so vividly that everyone will listen to them with great interest. And others even the most funny joke they will tell you in such a way that he will seem boring. It is precisely this difference in the ability to present oneself that prevents the latter from understanding what they lack to arouse interest among friends.

Okay, in general we figured out what distinguishes interesting people from ordinary people, unremarkable. What can you do to develop the same qualities in yourself? And then, the guy who is the soul of the company and the girl who is the soul of the company are probably not the same thing? How can a girl become the life of the party? For beautiful young ladies, we have prepared the following tips:

1. Try not to lose the charm of femininity in any situation. Be welcoming and friendly, smile more often. A sincere, warm smile will endear you to both friends and girlfriends.
2. Try to follow fashion. It is not at all necessary to spend a lot of money on buying more and more new things, but it is still worth keeping abreast of the main trends. Strive to develop your taste and sense of style. Beautiful, skillfully chosen clothes will highlight your individuality and help arouse interest in you. And, of course, don’t forget about taking care of your hair, skin, and body. A fashionably and expensively dressed but unkempt girl can alienate anyone!
3. Don't be monotonous. If you are ready to talk only about the same thing today, tomorrow and the day after tomorrow, then in a few days everyone will start to shy away from you. Expand your range of interests, and at the same time your horizons. Remember: the more interesting events you won't miss it, the more interesting people you will meet there.
4. Be cheerful and childishly playful. Don't try to appear more mature than you really are! Fun and childishness are very contagious, and you will give others the opportunity to let loose as well. It is memorable and you will always be greeted with joy.
5. Watch people. Make a list for yourself called “The Ten Most Interesting People I Know.” And write down at least three character traits of each of them that you think make these people interesting to others. From this list, extract key ideas that would describe an ideally charming person. This characteristic will become your guide to action!

Similarly, make a list of the “Ten Most unpleasant people, with whom I am familiar." And in the same way, make a list of those character traits that you would like to prevent in yourself. This is a very useful list, don't forget to look at it sometimes.

And the last piece of advice is to communicate with interesting people as much as possible, and then you can become the life of any company!

Most likely, you have more than once met people around whom a cheerful and friendly company invariably gathers. They become the center of their environment and never cease to generate interesting and unusual ideas, initiate all cultural and public events.

Looking at all this, it begins to seem that the question of how to become the soul of any company is decided on genetic level, and acquiring such talent is not possible under any circumstances. So what remains to be done? Resign yourself? No, only weak individuals do this, and the rest learn and move forward.

Sociability is your main weapon

The soul of the company differs from their peers in that it is very easy for them to find a common topic of conversation even with a completely unfamiliar interlocutor. A stranger who finds himself in his company will not be subject to inspection or questioning, but will be warmly received and treated kindly.

It turns out that the problem of how to become the soul of the party can only be solved by overcoming your own shyness. To do this, start a conversation without fear with strangers and, in general, strangers, especially when it comes to new members of your party. They will be immensely grateful to you for your attention, and it is you who will unite the company even more and make it the most comfortable place on earth.

You can gain experience communicating with strangers in everyday life. Feel free to start a dialogue with a taxi driver, a seller or a courier, and the topics can be completely different.

The soul of any company does not just strive to be the center of attention. This person manages to find free minutes to communicate with all his friends, call them, go to a cafe or cinema, help with advice or business. Moreover, this is done absolutely unobtrusively, naturally, and does not cause any reciprocal obligations.

Be cheerful and make others happy

No, no one is forcing you to learn the profession of a clown or comedian, but you still have to be a cheerful person. To do this, develop a sense of healthy humor, but do not become a bully who establishes himself by humiliating someone from his environment.

Make your group laugh with witty and fresh jokes, curious real and fictitious incidents, jokes and their interpretations in your own way.

Puzzled by the problem of how to be the soul of your own or a new company, you have to overcome the fear of seeming ridiculous or funny. Don't know how to dance? It's OK!

Get out on the dance floor and dance your heart out without worrying about technique or style. Moreover, pull out from the tables those who are sour there throughout the evening.

What does this mysterious definition of “soul of the company” mean? It can be called a person who is able to carry on a conversation, speak in different types and interesting topics, reasonedly argue, debate and manipulate the conversation. Of course, such a person cannot and should not know everything in the world, but he is simply obliged to have a lot of hobbies and interests. You will never hear from him “I’m not good at this” or “ let's change the subject».

To achieve all this, start opening up to everything new, constantly learn and develop in all directions. In order not to lose your mind, do not narrow your preferences in cooking, music, sports or science, have your own informed point of view and respect alternative ones.

• Give unobtrusive compliments to friends, acquaintances and strangers, praise them and encourage them, look for advantages in your opponent and point them out to others;
• A girl or a man should throw away embarrassment, uncertainty and complexes;
• To say that you are not given to be the life of the party is the simplest thing, although sometimes it is enough just to show your talents in the field of sports or fine arts;
• Fight your tightness, share interesting information with those around you, attract attention to yourself and willingly take part in disputes.

The ability to listen and hear is what distinguishes the soul of a company from all its other participants. Not everyone can sincerely listen to a stranger, and only a few can not interrupt. Therefore, during a conversation, ask clarifying and leading questions, maintain eye contact, do not move away from main topic and nod, making it clear that you are attention itself.

And one more thing: the person who is the soul of any company always smiles sincerely and naturally, endearing himself to those around him. Here it is important not to cross that invisible line when you can over-smile or under-smile. To do this, at the moment you stretch your lips into a smile, you need to imagine something unimaginably pleasant and cheerful.

Everyone in life has met people who, without exaggeration, can be called the soul of the party. They are cheerful, sociable, charming and interesting to everyone. Everyone dreams of being in their place. We can please you: nothing is impossible. Just try to follow our advice, and you will learn from your own experience how can you become the life of the party.

By being able to listen to your interlocutors and showing interest in them, you will very quickly earn a reputation as an interesting person.

How can one master the art of asking necessary questions? The secret is simple - listen to who you are talking to. If you focus on what the interlocutor is telling you, there will be no awkward pauses in your conversation when they expect a question or comment from you, but you don’t know what to say.

No less important in order to become the soul of the company is skill. People love to talk to those who show friendliness in their appearance. A smile on your face will help your interlocutor relax, feel more comfortable, and your communication will be much easier.

When speaking, remember to look into the eyes of the person you are talking to. This will allow him to feel interest in his person. If you look around and your eyes constantly jump from one person to another, your interlocutor may decide that you are looking for someone else who is more pleasant to you as a conversation partner, and this will not help in any way. to become the life of the party. Instead, you risk ending up in the category of boors, whom everyone tries to avoid communicating with.

One of the key factors to your success is body language. Try to repeat the movements of your interlocutor when communicating, and you will notice that an emotional connection will arise between you, which will also increase your authority in his eyes. Never forget to use this technique. It is very effective and can help with communication not only in informal companies, but also in serious working relationships.

A very important skill for someone who wants to become the life of the party is the ability to end a conversation on time and switch to another interlocutor. There is no need to bore just one person with your company or feel inconvenienced by the fact that you cannot “get rid of” someone who is too annoying. To interrupt a conversation, it is enough to make it clear that you have some urgent matter - making a phone call, resolving an issue with someone who may soon leave, going to the toilet, in the end. This technique should not be abused. Try to manipulate the flow of the conversation. Let your friend tell you his information, comment on it, ask a question and draw a logical conclusion, making it clear that the topic has exhausted itself. You can then communicate that you need to talk to someone, while promising that if the opportunity arises, you are willing to continue the conversation later. This approach will allow you to avoid the reputation of being ignorant or rude and, on the contrary, to seem like a pleasant person to talk to.

To summarize, we can say that the answer to the question " how to become the life of the party" is quite simple. To do this, it is enough just to be able to listen to your interlocutors. This approach is equally effective for both friendly parties, and for corporate events. By showing interest in people, you will begin to have a reputation for being good, and everyone present will want to talk to you, which means that you have truly become the life of the party and have achieved your goal.

Thank you for your attention!

Every person dreams of being the life of the party, always attracting the attention of interlocutors, and being able to start and maintain a conversation in any conditions. However, this is not always possible. The company whose soul you want to be sometimes very quickly begins to move away from you and communicate separately. What's the problem? How to fix this? In this article you will find several secrets of successful conversations that will allow you to succeed in any social situation, keeping everyone interested without any problems. For some people this comes easily and without outside help, but these are rather exceptions to the rule. In most cases, people get confused when they need to carry on a conversation, interest the interlocutor and show that there are no social obstacles for them. To become a confident person who can carry on any conversation, you need to constantly practice. As for these tips, they will help you achieve results much faster. With their help, you can always remain the soul of absolutely any company in the future and support every conversation.

Don't talk too much, stay positive

Keeping your statements short will help slow down the inevitable decline in your popularity that will be caused by constant talking. And, if you say something positive as often as possible, it will lift the spirits of everyone in the same room as you. If you choose a positive tone, it will rub off on others.

Act like your heroes

Write down the names of the ten most interesting people you know and write down three characteristics each that made them deserve a place on your list. Then analyze the list and come up with a way to incorporate these characteristics into your own public persona.

Be prepared to respond with something like “Tell me about yourself.”

You know the details of your life quite clearly, but identifying the most interesting parts of it in order to use them in conversation is quite difficult. difficult task. You should use one of three plots for your life story: It must be either a challenge (you overcame an obstacle to get to where you are now), creativity (you decided not to go the traditional route), or connection (you did something the same as the person asking you ).

Ask and listen

Start with your interlocutor's hobbies, family or immediate travel plans, and from there you can develop further conversation. If you know something about the chosen topic, the conversation will start and continue on its own. If you don't know, keep asking questions to find out more while paying attention to the answers.

Read!

If you want to always have something to talk about with anyone, you should read as much as possible. It could be like fiction, as well as various non-fiction works that will allow you to expand your own horizons and become a much more interesting interlocutor.

Listen to podcasts

If you don’t have the opportunity or desire to spend many hours reading thick books, you can download several interesting podcasts. You will be able to learn some interesting quotes, get acquainted with inspiring ideas and meaningful stories while you drive to work or clean the house.

Wear conversation clothes

Wearing something that stands out can be a great conversation starter. If you choose a brooch you bought on a trip to Italy or a tie with your university's mascot on it, it can allow you to strike up a conversation and find a lot in common between yourself and the other person.

Learn to recognize when you make people bored

Naturally, you're passionate about the details of your job because you spend most of your time doing it, but that doesn't mean everyone else is as interested. Being interesting means knowing when you're not interesting, so pay attention to your body language. If the people you're talking to are visibly bored, fidgeting, or looking around impatiently, it's time to change the subject.

Ask open questions

If you want your question to be a great conversation starter, you'll want to stay away from questions that can be answered with one word. Open-ended questions require a deeper answer, which will give everyone in the conversation more details to work with further. To the question “How was your weekend?” can be answered with “Okay”, while the question “What did you enjoy most about the weekend?” could be the start of a good story.

Always have a few stories in mind

You don't go to a job interview without having a couple of stories to tell to show how qualified specialist you are. If you know you'll be attending an event where you'll be interacting with other people, you'll need to have a couple of stories ready before you even arrive. If there is a lull in the conversation, you can use one of your stories to enliven the conversation.

Put some emotion into it

People will only be interested in your story if it resonates with them, regardless of whether they have been in a similar situation or can imagine themselves in one. Stories about other people might fall into this category, while stories about things like your new dishwasher are unlikely to come close. a large number people.