Part 1. Conflicts between schoolchildren.

It is in the general education school that the foundations of human behavior in the future in pre-conflict and conflict situations are laid.

In order to prevent conflicts, it is necessary to have at least a general understanding of how they arise, develop and end in school communities, what their characteristics and causes are.

Like any social institution, a comprehensive school is characterized by various conflicts. Pedagogical activity is aimed at the purposeful formation of personality, its goal is to transfer to schoolchildren a certain social experience and to more fully master this experience. Therefore, it is at school that it is necessary to create favorable socio-psychological conditions that provide mental comfort to the teacher, student and parents.

Features of conflicts between schoolchildren.

In a general education institution, four main subjects of activity can be distinguished: student, teacher, parents and administrator. Depending on which subjects interact, conflicts are divided into the following types: student-student; student-teacher; student-parents; student administrator; teacher-teacher; teacher-parents; teacher-administrator; parents-whether-parents; parent administrator; administrator-administrator.

Conflicts among teenagers are characteristic of all times and peoples, be it the school in the works of N. Pomyalovsky or the aristocratic school of the 19th century described by R. Kipling, or a group of boys who found themselves without adults on a desert island, from the book “Lord of the Flies” by the English writer W. . Golding.

As noted in the review of school conflicts prepared by A.I. Shipilov, most common among students leadership conflicts, which reflect the struggle of two or three leaders and their groups for championship in the class. In middle school, there is often conflict between a group of boys and a group of girls. There may be a conflict between three or four teenagers with a whole class or a conflict between one student and the class. According to the observations of psychologists (O. Sitkovskaya, O. Mikhailova), the path to leadership, especially among teenagers, is associated with a demonstration of superiority, cynicism, cruelty, and ruthlessness. Child cruelty is a well-known phenomenon. One of the paradoxes of world pedagogy is that a child, to a greater extent than an adult, is subject to a sense of herdism, prone to unmotivated cruelty and bullying of his own kind.

The genesis of aggressive behavior in schoolchildren is associated with defects in the socialization of the individual. Thus, a positive relationship was found between the number of aggressive actions in preschoolers and the frequency of their punishment used by parents (R. Sire). In addition, it was confirmed that conflict-ridden boys were raised, as a rule, by parents who used physical violence against them (A. Bandura). Therefore, a number of researchers consider punishment to be a model of conflict behavior of an individual (L. Javinen, S. Larsens).

In the early stages of socialization, aggression can arise accidentally, but if the goal is successfully achieved in an aggressive way, a desire may arise to again use aggression to get out of various difficult situations. If there is an appropriate personal basis, it is not aggression as a method of achievement that becomes important, but aggression as an end in itself; it becomes an independent motive of behavior, causing hostility towards others with a low level of self-control.

In addition, a teenager’s conflicts in relationships with classmates are caused by a peculiarity of age - the formation of moral and ethical criteria for assessing a peer and the associated requirements for his behavior (V. Lozotseva).

It should be noted that conflicts in school groups clearly not sufficiently studied by teachers, psychologists, sociologists and representatives of other sciences, therefore there is no holistic understanding of their causes and characteristics. This is evidenced by the fact that so far there are practically no works intended for teachers and principals that would contain clear and proven recommendations for the prevention and constructive resolution of interpersonal conflicts in school. But in order to manage conflicts, like any other phenomenon, it is first necessary to thoroughly study them in order to understand the driving forces of their development. However, certain efforts in this direction have already been made and are being done.

Of all types of conflicts in school groups, the clashes between teacher and student have been studied in most detail. Conflicts in student relationships have been studied to a lesser extent. There is even less work on the problem of regulating conflicts that arise between teachers. This is understandable: conflicts between teachers are the most complex.

Pedagogical conflictology has already identified the main factors that determine the characteristics of conflicts between students.

Firstly, the specifics of conflicts between schoolchildren are determined by developmental psychology. The age of students has a significant influence both on the causes of conflicts, as well as on the characteristics of their development and methods of completion.

Age- a specific, qualitatively unique, time-limited stage of development of an individual. The following main age periods can be distinguished: infant (up to 1 year), early childhood (1-3 years), preschool age (3 years - 6-7 years), primary school age (6-7 - 10-11 years), adolescence (10-11 - 15 years), senior school age (15-18 years), late youth (18-23 years), mature age (up to 60 years), elderly (up to 75 years), senile (over 75 years).

It is known that during schooling there is a stage of the most intensive development of a person. School covers a significant part of childhood, all of adolescence and early adolescence. Conflicts among schoolchildren differ markedly from conflicts among adults. There are also significant differences in the conflicts that occur in primary, junior high and secondary schools. The main conflict-generating factor that determines the characteristics of conflicts between students is the process of socialization of students. Socialization is the process and result of the individual’s assimilation and active reproduction of social experience, manifested in communication and activity. Socialization of schoolchildren occurs naturally in everyday life and activities, and also purposefully as a result of pedagogical influence on students at school. One of the ways and manifestations of socialization among schoolchildren is interpersonal conflict.. During conflicts with others, a child, young man, or girl becomes aware of how they can and cannot act in relation to their peers, teachers, and parents.

Secondly, the characteristics of conflicts between schoolchildren are determined by the nature of their activities at school, the main content of which is study. In psychology A.V. Petrovsky developed the concept of activity-based mediation of interpersonal relationships. He emphasizes the determining influence of the content, goals and values ​​of joint activities on the system of interpersonal relationships in a group and team. Interpersonal relationships in student and teaching teams differ markedly from relationships in teams and groups of other types. These differences are largely due to the specifics of the pedagogical process in a comprehensive school.

Thirdly, the specifics of conflicts between rural school students in modern conditions are determined by the external way of life in rural areas, the socio-economic situation that has developed today in rural areas. The rural school is an integral and important structural element of rural society. It influences life in the village. But the situation in the village in general and a particular village in particular has a significant impact on the state of affairs in the rural school. Relationships and conflicts in rural school communities respectively reflect all the main contradictions and problems that permeate rural life today. By communicating with parents, students learn about the main difficulties that adults face. One way or another, schoolchildren know about many problems of rural life, experience them in their own way, and transform these problems into relationships with peers and teachers.

The study, conducted under the direction of V.I. Zhuravlev in schools of the Moscow region, made it possible to identify some features of local conflicts and related phenomena in the relationships of students.

Student-student conflicts occur in the following situations:

• due to insults, gossip, envy, denunciations - 11%;
• due to lack of mutual understanding - 7%;
• in connection with the struggle for leadership - 7%;
• due to the opposition between the student’s personality and the team - 7%;
• in connection with social work - 6%;
• for girls - because of a guy - 5%.

11% of students believed that there were no conflicts; 61% of schoolchildren experienced a feeling of hatred towards their classmates.

These data indicate that not all is well in the relationships between classmates at school.

The main reasons for hatred towards peers:

• meanness and betrayal - 30%;
• sycophancy, the existence of “fake” excellent students and teachers’ favorites - 27%;
• personal grievance - 15%;
• lies and arrogance - 12%;
• rivalry between classmates - 9%.

Students’ conflict levels are significantly influenced by their individual psychological characteristics, in particular aggressiveness. The presence of aggressive students in the class increases the likelihood of conflicts not only with their participation, but also without them - between other members of the class team. Schoolchildren’s opinions about the causes of aggression and conflicts are as follows:

• reason for aggression: desire to stand out among peers - 12%;
• source of aggression: callousness and cruelty of adults - 11%;
• everything depends on the relationships in the class - 9.5%;
• the family is to blame for the student’s aggressiveness - 8%;
• aggressive schoolchildren - children with mental disabilities - 4%;
• aggressiveness is an age-related phenomenon associated with excess energy - 1%;
• aggressiveness is a bad character trait - 1%;
• there were aggressive students in the class - 12%;
• there were no aggressive students in the class - 34.5%.

Conflicts between students at school arise, among other things, due to misconduct and violations of generally accepted norms in the behavior of schoolchildren. Standards of behavior for students at school have been developed in the interests of all students and teachers. If they are observed, it is implied that contradictions in school groups are reduced to a minimum. Violation of these norms, as a rule, leads to infringement of someone's interests. A clash of interests is the basis for conflict. Schoolchildren, in their own opinion, most often commit the following violations of behavioral norms at school:

• smoking - 50%;
• drinking alcohol - 44%;
• rudeness, rudeness in communication - 31%;
• use of obscene expressions in speech - 26.5%;
• false - 15%;
• students' disrespect for each other - 13%;
• promiscuity in sexual life - 10%;
• petty theft - 10%; fights - 10%;
• hooliganism - 10%;
• drug addiction - 6%;
• bullying of the younger and weaker - 6%;
• gambling (for money) - 3%.

Features of conflicts in school groups.

Features of conflicts between students schools are determined, first of all, by the specifics of the age psychology of children, adolescents and young men (girls). The emergence, development and completion of conflicts are significantly influenced by the nature of the educational process and its organization in a particular educational institution. The third factor influencing conflicts in student relationships is the way of life and the existing socio-economic situation.

Conflicts at school must be prevented and resolved in a timely manner. Modern methods of conflict prevention will allow you to solve the problem without consequences for the child’s psyche.

School conflict is an inevitable and multifaceted phenomenon. It can arise out of nothing: because of the slightest dispute, a difference in preferences, clothing, academic success.

This happens primarily because children tend to exaggerate, simplify everything, and prove their “maturity” and influence.

Types and features

Each conflict situation is unique. It has its own prerequisites, explicit and implicit, its participants and individual methods of resolution.

In any educational institution there are several main subjects: the teacher, the student, the student’s parent and the administration representative. They can also act as participants in a conflict situation.

Conventionally, we can distinguish several types of conflicts occurring in the school environment:

1. Conflicts between students at school. Most often they are expressed in the struggle for leadership in the class. Sometimes an “anti-leader” is chosen - a person for aggressive bullying. In some cases, conflict arises by accident.
2. Conflicts between students and teachers. Most often, there is a mismatch of interests and pedagogical errors. Such conflicts manifest themselves in poor performance or failure to complete the tasks assigned to the student. Often such situations arise during the “acclimatization” period, when a new student or teacher comes to the class.
3. Conflicts between a teacher and a student’s parent.
4. Conflict involving the director of the establishment. It occurs quite rarely; most often, controversial situations are resolved within a certain group.
5. Problematic situation involving outsiders.

This typology distributes conflicts according to their participants. In practice, most controversial situations fall into the first three groups.

Causes and ways to resolve conflicts at school

Conflict situations are inevitable. However, both negative and positive results can be drawn from each case. It all depends on how correctly the causes of the conflict are analyzed and what conclusions the parties came to.

In each case, a constructive and destructive way to resolve the conflict is possible:

1. With constructive the outcome of the conflict situation satisfied all interested participants.
2. With destructive option, someone (perhaps everyone) remained unsatisfied.

Let us examine the main conflict situations in more detail.

Student - student

Conflicts between children, both intra- and inter-age, are commonplace. The teacher in this case acts as an observer, and he can also help in resolving a controversial situation.

Why do they arise?

1. The first reason for conflict situations between students is age. Aggression in primary school is the result of insufficient socialization. Children do not yet understand how to act towards other people, they do not understand the difference between “you can” and “you cannot.”
2. Conflicts in high school are more conscious. The student understands the difference between good and evil. Here a lot depends on upbringing, the authority of the teacher as an observing party. The immediate causes of disagreement are also becoming more complex. Along with the usual childhood grievances, there appears a struggle for leadership in the group, struggle between groups, and personal rivalry.
3. One of the most dangerous types of conflicts is social. Children from intact families often conflict with children from single-parent families. The result can be either uncontrolled aggression on either side or an attempt to withdraw. It is very important to identify the problem in a timely manner and resolve it in the optimal way.
4. Ethnic conflicts are also common when there are members of different ethnic groups in the classroom.

Solutions

In some cases, a conflict situation is resolved within the group, without the intervention of outsiders. However, it is important to monitor, guide and control it:

1. The role of the teacher. A competent teacher can resolve a conflict at the initial stage, eliminating its further development. One of the preventive measures is maximum cohesion of the children's team. Schools organize various events and competitions. It is important to ensure that inter-class conflict does not arise.
2. Role of the parent. However, the teacher in a modern school does not always have sufficient authority among students. Parents also play a role in resolving conflict situations. The method of settlement in this case depends on the relationships in the family. For example, if the relationship between parents and children is strained, there is no need to have a heart-to-heart talk; the parents simply will not be able to force the child to be frank. In this case, it is better to choose an appropriate story “from life” and present it at the “appropriate moment”.

Student - teacher

The conflict situation between student and teacher is one of the most common in the school environment. Conventionally, such situations can be divided as follows:

1. Conflicts arising from poor performance or the student’s poor academic performance, as well as when performing various extracurricular tasks. Most often it occurs due to student fatigue, too difficult material, or lack of help from the teacher. Today, such situations arise, among other things, because the teacher makes excessive demands on students and uses grades in the subject as a means of punishment.
2. Teacher's reaction to violation students of certain rules of behavior in the educational institution and outside it. Most often, the reason is the teacher’s inability to assess the current situation and correctly analyze the student’s behavior. As a result, incorrect conclusions about what happened. The student does not agree with such conclusions, and as a result, a conflict situation arises.
3. Emotional and personality conflicts. Usually they are the result of insufficient qualifications of the teacher and incorrect resolution of previous pre-conflict situations. They are personal in nature and often last for years.

Why do they arise?

Common causes of conflict include:

1. Lack of responsibility teacher for competent resolution of conflict situations.
2. Different status and life experiences participants in a problem situation, which determines their behavior.
3. Inability to look at the conflict “from the outside”. One problem is seen differently through the eyes of a teacher and a student.

Solutions

Most often, a conflict with a teacher is the result of his being wrong. The student is just beginning to socialize, the teacher has already passed a certain path:

1. Raising your voice at students is not allowed.. This can only lead to an aggravation of the problem situation. It is necessary to react calmly to any reaction on the part of the student, controlling emotions.
2. Serious psychological conversations need to be carefully thought out with students. If you need to punish someone, it must be done as correctly as possible, without making it look like it. If the source of the conflict is a problem student, he can be further stimulated, for example, by giving an important task.

Teacher - student's parent

The conflict situation between parents and teachers is a relatively new phenomenon, but is gaining momentum. It arises due to mutual distrust and different attitudes towards the child.

Why do they arise?

There are two views on the problem: teachers and parents. From a parent's point of view, the problem is this:

1. Lack of teacher competence: teaches incorrectly, does not communicate with parents.
2. The teacher does not know how to find an approach.
3. Unreasonable underestimation of grades, excessive demands on the student.

The teacher makes his claims:

1. Parents do not pay attention to the proper upbringing of their child.
2. Unreasonable demands of parents on the teacher, often exceeding his official duties.

The immediate cause of the conflict can be anything: a careless remark, a bad grade, aggression, nagging.

Solutions

In any case, the child will remain the injured party, so the conflict situation should be resolved quickly. If necessary, an informal leader is involved - every parent team has one.

First of all, it is necessary to recognize the existence of a conflict and the need to resolve it. Both sides must commit their views on the issue, completely consciously and voluntarily. Negotiations involve only the direct participants in the conflict plus a “judge,” a maximally detached person who develops resolution options.

There can be many immediate ways to resolve a conflict. Radical options are the teacher or student leaving school. Less radical ways involve finding compromises.

The teacher and parent should see each other not as competitors, but as comrades-in-arms and use the basic principle of family and school - “do no harm.”

Ways to prevent school disputes

In many cases, correct diagnosis of the situation will help prevent conflict. Each exacerbation of the problem is preceded by a pre-conflict situation, by working through which you can avoid aggression.

1. One of the ways to prevent conflicts is to monitor students, search for common interests and goals. If students are united by some goal, many problems are simply removed.
2. Other problems (jealousy, personal motives) are resolved individually. In some cases, just talking is enough, in others, the help of a professional child psychologist is necessary.

In any case, it is very important not to miss the moment. If the conflict has entered an active stage, there is no point in taking measures to prevent it.

Video: Conflicts at school

Psychological problems of children

Causes of conflicts at school

The struggle for authority

Resentment and insults

Unrequited sympathy

Types of conflicts at school

Conflict between students

Teacher and student

Teacher and student's parents

Conflict resolution at school

25.12.2016

Snezhana Ivanova

Conflicts at school are an integral part of the educational process. Conflict between peers in itself is not something out of the ordinary.

Conflicts at school are an integral part of the educational process. In itself, conflict between peers is not something out of the ordinary. Such a conflict contains the opportunity for personal growth, since the need to learn to defend one’s position in front of classmates and to have one’s own point of view on any issue increases. Often conflicts at school are episodic in nature, that is, they break out from time to time between all students. A child, once in a children's group, must learn to live according to its laws. It is not always immediately possible to do this painlessly and easily. What are school conflicts, and should you try to avoid them?

Causes of conflicts at school

Like any phenomenon, conflicts among classmates have their reasons. Most often, conflicts arise between students of the same class and are based on a discrepancy in character, a clash of different opinions on a particular issue. Most conflicts occur during adolescence. The age of thirteen to sixteen years is characterized by increased impressionability, suspiciousness and anxiety. One careless word can provoke the development of a conflict. Young people and girls at this age do not yet have sufficient tolerance towards others. They see everything in black and white and give their own assessment to any phenomenon. Resolving such conflicts in some cases requires the participation of parents in the child's life. What are the main reasons for conflicts among schoolchildren?

The struggle for authority

The most common cause of conflict is the struggle for the opportunity to be the leader among peers. A child with leadership qualities will strive to demonstrate his strength to others. Boys, more often than not, prove their superiority through physical strength, while girls learn to manipulate gracefully. In any case, there is a struggle for authority. The teenager tries with all the strength of his soul to be heard and thereby satisfy his deep need for recognition. This process cannot be called fast and calm. Sometimes years pass before yesterday's child understands which methods are acceptable and which ones are better to refuse.

Resentment and insults

Another reason for acute conflict with peers is multiple grievances and misunderstandings. The situation when the weak and defenseless are bullied in the classroom is, unfortunately, not uncommon today. The conflict, formed by the need to defend one’s individuality, leads to the formation of such qualities in the individual as distrust and isolation. School bullying is harmful not only to the person being bullied, but also to other students. Teenagers see a picture of unpleasant aggressive actions, which are often accompanied by complete impunity.

Resentments and insults among students of the same class necessarily lead to pronounced conflict. Whatever the reason for the glaring disagreements, it requires mandatory resolution. Children do not know how to hide their feelings; they want to understand the current situation immediately. At the same time, discipline and the general atmosphere in the team suffer. Teachers complain that students are becoming uncontrollable and aggressive.

Unrequited sympathy

An important cause of conflict in the classroom is the first love. During puberty, adolescents begin to become interested in peers of the opposite sex. There is a kind of strong leap in development. A boy or girl simply cannot continue to live in the old way. They begin to look for additional opportunities to please and impress. Unrequited feelings can lead to a dramatic outcome: apathy, inner emptiness and reluctance to reveal the depth of your experiences to anyone. It must be said that at this age, unrequited sympathy is very common. Moreover, there is a fair opinion that at one time in life every person experienced what it means to be rejected by the object of his adoration.

During their first courtship, many teenagers become nervous and irritable. This happens because they still have little experience in building trusting relationships. At the same time, every young person over the age of fifteen needs close relationships, wants to achieve maximum understanding and be heard by others. The discrepancy between one's own feelings and reality leads to the emergence of open conflicts that require immediate resolution.

Types of conflicts at school

Conflicts at school have their own specifics and are distinguished by the varying involvement of adults in this process. The degree of expression can be strong or quite weak. A hidden conflict often remains invisible to others, since its participants do not take active action for a long time. Examples of conflicts show how important it is to act at the first signs of trouble and psychological discomfort in a child. The following types of conflicts in school are distinguished.

Conflict between students

This type of conflict is characterized by the formation of persistent non-acceptance of some individuals by others. The warring parties create unbearable living conditions for each other and participate in various conspiracies. The participants in the conflict are children and adolescents. The unwritten rule of such conflicts is their duration, aggressiveness, and cruelty towards their opponents. Children not only do not try to understand each other, but also deliberately aggravate the enmity with manifestations of contempt and demonstrative disrespect.

Example: there is a physically weak boy in the class, whom everyone makes fun of and mocks. Other students constantly provoke him into an open quarrel. The conflict worsens over time, but is not resolved in any way, because the young man does not want to respond with cruelty to the attacks of his classmates. Those guys who take his side are also persecuted by the leader and his group.

Teacher and student

A fairly common type of conflict is misunderstanding between the teacher and students. How often do students believe that they are unfairly given bad grades and make little effort to correct the situation! Neither the rejection of teachers nor the condemnation of classmates works. Sometimes a child, for some reason, becomes so immersed in himself and his own world that he stops noticing the events happening around him. This only prolongs the conflict, which does not contribute to its resolution. Meanwhile, in the “Teacher-Student” model, the child is not always to blame. The teacher, in any case, is older and wiser than any teenager, and therefore must try to eliminate the conflict or at least reduce it to a minimum. It must be said that teachers are also not always attentive to students. Bad mood, problems at home, personal ailments - all this leaves a serious imprint on the personality. Many teachers suffer from the fact that they attach negative labels to the child and treat him with prejudice from the very first mistake, without giving him the opportunity to correct it.

Example: a girl, a sixth grade student, is not doing well in the English subject. The teacher gives her unsatisfactory grades. The child, in desperation, tries to correct the situation, but she fails - she has neglected the subject too much due to a long-term illness. The teacher does not want to delve into these details, believing that the student must fill in the gap on her own.

Teacher and student's parents

Often a conflict occurs between the parents of one of the students and the teacher himself. Parents accuse the teacher of having a biased attitude towards their child. In this situation, everyone suffers and, first of all, the child. The teacher develops a negative opinion about a particular student, and he involuntarily ignores him in his work. The child gets used to being deprived of the teacher’s praise and in the future does not try to correct the situation. Parents are completely disappointed in the education system.

Example: parents of a second grade student start a showdown with the teacher for any reason, asking why the child got a B, why not an A? The conflict grows: the child develops a reluctance to learn, because before his eyes the parents behave incorrectly with the teacher. The teacher begins to seek help from the head teacher and the director.

Conflict resolution at school

Any conflicts need to be resolved. Otherwise, tension increases and problems only increase. How can school disagreements be minimized? In a dispute, everyone is confident that they are right. Meanwhile, if you try to understand your opponent, you can significantly reduce the impact of the conflict itself. All you need to do is put yourself in your opponent's shoes. Teachers should try to imagine how a child feels when he neglected school material (even through his own fault), but no one wants to understand him. Parents constantly scold for poor performance. How can a child independently find a way out of this situation if he is deprived of all support in advance?

Resolving conflicts in school should begin with accepting responsibility for one's actions and actions. The student must be aware that he has responsibilities that must be fulfilled. Teachers should strive to see positive character traits in children, try to establish contact with each individual child, and present the material being studied in an intelligible and engaging manner.

Thus, the topic of school conflicts is not new at all. Every person has encountered it at least once in their life. The well-being of the child and the formation of his worldview depend on how quickly and correctly a significant disagreement between the parties to the controversy can be resolved.

In the course of his professional activity, a teacher, in addition to his immediate responsibilities related to the training and education of the younger generation, has to communicate with colleagues, students, and their parents.

In daily interactions, it is hardly possible to avoid conflict situations. And is it necessary? After all, by correctly resolving a tense moment, it is easy to achieve good constructive results, bring people closer, help them understand each other, and achieve progress in educational aspects.

Definition of conflict. Destructive and constructive ways to resolve conflict situations

What is conflict? Definitions of this concept can be divided into two groups. In the public consciousness, conflict is most often synonymous with hostile, negative confrontation between people due to incompatibility of interests, norms of behavior, and goals.

But there is another understanding of conflict as an absolutely natural phenomenon in the life of society, which does not necessarily lead to negative consequences. On the contrary, when choosing the right channel for its flow, it is an important component of the development of society.

Depending on the results of resolving conflict situations, they can be designated as destructive or constructive. The result of a destructive collision is dissatisfaction of one or both parties with the outcome of the collision, destruction of relationships, resentment, and misunderstanding.

A conflict is constructive, the solution of which was useful for the parties involved in it, if they built, acquired something valuable for themselves in it, and were satisfied with its result.

Variety of school conflicts. Causes and solutions

Conflict in school is a multifaceted phenomenon. When communicating with participants in school life, the teacher also has to be a psychologist. The following “debriefing” of clashes with each group of participants can become a “cheat sheet” for a teacher on exams in the subject “School Conflict”.

Conflict "Student - student"

Disagreements between children are a common occurrence, including in school life. In this case, the teacher is not a conflicting party, but sometimes it is necessary to take part in a dispute between students.

Causes of conflicts between students

• struggle for authority
• rivalry
• deception, gossip
• insults
• grievances
• hostility towards the teacher's favorite students
• personal dislike for a person
• sympathy without reciprocity
• fight for a girl (boy)

Ways to resolve conflicts between students.

How can such disagreements be resolved constructively? Very often, children can resolve a conflict situation on their own, without the help of an adult. If teacher intervention is still necessary, it is important to do so in a calm manner. It is better to do without putting pressure on the child, without public apologies, and limit yourself to a hint. It is better if the student himself finds an algorithm for solving this problem. Constructive conflict will add social skills to the child’s experience, which will help him communicate with peers and teach him how to solve problems, which will be useful to him in adult life.

After resolving a conflict situation, dialogue between the teacher and the child is important. It is good to call the student by name; it is important that he feels an atmosphere of trust and goodwill. You can say something like: “Dima, conflict is not a reason to worry. There will be many more disagreements like this in your life, and that's not a bad thing. It is important to solve it correctly, without mutual reproaches and insults, to draw conclusions, to work on mistakes. Such a conflict will be useful."

A child often quarrels and shows aggression if he has no friends and hobbies. In this case, the teacher can try to correct the situation by talking with the student’s parents, recommending that the child enroll in a club or sports section, according to his interests. A new activity will not leave time for intrigue and gossip, but will give you an interesting and useful pastime and new acquaintances.

Conflict “Teacher - student’s parent”

Such conflicting actions can be provoked by both the teacher and the parent. Dissatisfaction can be mutual.

Causes of conflict between teacher and parents

• different ideas of the parties about the means of education
• parent's dissatisfaction with teacher's teaching methods
• personal enmity
• parent's opinion about the unreasonable underestimation of the child's grades

Ways to resolve conflicts with student parents.

How can such discontent be constructively resolved and stumbling blocks broken? When a conflict situation arises at school, it is important to sort it out calmly, realistically, and without distortion, look at things. Usually, everything happens in a different way: the conflicting person turns a blind eye to his own mistakes, while simultaneously looking for them in the opponent’s behavior.

When the situation is soberly assessed and the problem is outlined, it is easier for the teacher to find the true cause conflict with a “difficult” parent, evaluate the correctness of the actions of both parties, and outline the path to a constructive resolution of the unpleasant moment.

The next step on the path to agreement will be an open dialogue between the teacher and the parent, where the parties are equal. The analysis of the situation will help the teacher express his thoughts and ideas about the problem to the parent, show understanding, clarify the common goal, and together find a way out of the current situation.

After resolving the conflict, drawing conclusions about what was done wrong and what should have been done to prevent a tense moment from occurring will help prevent similar situations in the future.

Example:

Anton is a self-confident high school student who does not have extraordinary abilities. Relations with the guys in the class are cool, there are no school friends.

At home, the boy characterizes the children in a negative way, pointing out their shortcomings, fictitious or exaggerated, shows dissatisfaction with the teachers, and notes that many teachers lower his grades.

The mother unconditionally believes her son and assents to him, which further spoils the boy’s relationship with his classmates and causes negativity towards the teachers.

The volcano of conflict explodes when a parent comes to school in anger with complaints against teachers and school administration. No amount of persuasion or persuasion has a cooling effect on her. The conflict does not stop until the child graduates from school. It is obvious that this situation is destructive.

What could be a constructive approach to solving a pressing problem?

Using the above recommendations, we can assume that Anton’s class teacher could analyze the current situation something like this: “The mother’s conflict with the school teachers was provoked by Anton. This indicates the boy’s internal dissatisfaction with his relationships with the guys in the class. The mother added fuel to the fire without understanding the situation, increasing her son’s hostility and mistrust of the people around him at school. Which caused a response, which was expressed by the cool attitude of the guys towards Anton.”

The common goal of the parent and teacher could be the desire to unite Anton's relationship with the class.

A good result can be obtained from a dialogue between the teacher and Anton and his mother, which would show the class teacher’s desire to help the boy. It is important that Anton himself wants to change. It’s good to talk with the kids in the class so that they reconsider their attitude towards the boy, entrust them with joint responsible work, and organize extracurricular activities that help unite the kids.

Conflict "Teacher - student"

Such conflicts are perhaps the most frequent, because students and teachers spend hardly less time together than parents and children.

Causes of conflicts between teacher and students

• lack of unity in teachers' demands
• excessive demands on the student
• inconstancy of teacher's demands
• failure to comply with requirements by the teacher himself
• the student feels underestimated
• the teacher cannot come to terms with the student's shortcomings
• personal qualities of a teacher or student (irritability, helplessness, rudeness)

Resolving teacher-student conflict

It is better to defuse a tense situation without leading it to conflict. To do this, you can use some psychological techniques.

The natural reaction to irritability and raising your voice is similar actions. The consequence of a conversation in a raised voice will be an aggravation of the conflict. Therefore, the correct action on the part of the teacher would be a calm, friendly, confident tone in response to the student’s violent reaction. Soon the child will be “infected” by the calmness of the teacher.

Dissatisfaction and irritability most often come from lagging students who do not conscientiously fulfill their school duties. You can inspire a student to succeed in their studies and help them forget about their dissatisfaction by entrusting them with a responsible task and expressing confidence that they will perform it well.

A friendly and fair attitude towards students will be the key to a healthy atmosphere in the classroom and will make it easy to follow the proposed recommendations.

It is worth noting that during the dialogue between teacher and student, it is important to take certain things into account. It is worth preparing for it in advance so that you know what to tell your child. How to say - the component is no less important. A calm tone and absence of negative emotions is what you need to get a good result. And it’s better to forget the commanding tone that teachers often use, reproaches and threats. You need to be able to listen and hear the child.

If punishment is necessary, it is worth thinking through it in such a way as to prevent humiliation of the student and a change in attitude towards him.

Example

A sixth grade student, Oksana, does poorly in her studies, is irritable and rude when communicating with the teacher. During one of the lessons, the girl interfered with other children’s tasks, threw pieces of paper at the children, and did not react to the teacher even after several comments addressed to her. Oksana also did not react to the teacher’s request to leave the class, remaining seated. The teacher's irritation led him to decide to stop teaching the lesson and leave the entire class after school after the bell rang. This, naturally, led to dissatisfaction with the guys.

Such a solution to the conflict led to destructive changes in the mutual understanding of the student and the teacher.

A constructive solution to the problem could look like this. After Oksana ignored the teacher’s request to stop disturbing the children, the teacher could get out of the situation by laughing it off, saying something with an ironic smile to the girl, for example: “Oksana ate a little porridge today, the range and accuracy of her throw is suffering, the last piece of paper never reached the addressee.” After this, calmly continue teaching the lesson further.

After the lesson, you could try to talk with the girl, show her your friendly attitude, understanding, desire to help. It’s a good idea to talk to the girl’s parents to find out the possible reason for this behavior. Paying more attention to the girl, entrusting her with important tasks, providing assistance in completing tasks, encouraging her actions with praise - all this would be useful in the process of bringing the conflict to a constructive outcome.

A unified algorithm for resolving any school conflict

Having studied the recommendations given for each of the conflicts in school, you can trace the similarity of their constructive resolution. Let's designate it again.

• The first thing that will be beneficial when a problem is ripe is calm.
• The second point is to analyze the situation without vicissitudes.
• The third important point is an open dialogue between the conflicting parties, the ability to listen to the interlocutor, and calmly express your view on the problem of the conflict.
• The fourth thing that will help you reach the desired constructive result is identifying a common goal, ways to solve the problem that will allow you to reach this goal.
• The last, fifth point will be conclusions that will help avoid mistakes of communication and interaction in the future.

So what is conflict? Good or evil? The answers to these questions lie in the way tense situations are resolved. The absence of conflicts in school is almost impossible. And you still have to solve them. A constructive solution brings with it trusting relationships and peace in the classroom, a destructive solution accumulates resentment and irritation. Stopping and thinking at the moment when irritation and anger surge is an important point in choosing your way to resolve conflict situations.

School conflicts include conflicts between students. As noted in the review of school conflicts prepared by A. I. Shipilov, the most common leadership conflicts among students reflect the struggle of two or three leaders and their groups for primacy in the class. In middle school, a group of boys and a group of girls often clash. There may be a conflict between three or four teenagers with a whole class or a conflict between one student and the class. According to the observations of psychologists (O. Sitkovskaya, O. Mikhailova), the path to leadership, especially among teenagers, is associated with a demonstration of superiority, cynicism, cruelty, and ruthlessness. Child cruelty is a well-known phenomenon. A child, to a greater extent than an adult, is susceptible to a sense of herdism and is prone to unmotivated cruelty and bullying of weak peers.

The origins of aggressive behavior in schoolchildren are associated with defects in education. Thus, a positive relationship was found between the number of aggressive actions in preschoolers and the frequency of their punishment used by parents (R. Sire). In addition, it was confirmed that conflict boys were raised, as a rule, by parents who used physical violence against them. Therefore, a number of researchers consider punishment to be a model of conflict behavior of an individual (L. Javinen, S. Larsens).

Conflicts between individual adolescents and peers serve as the culmination of their troubles. A number of psychological studies have shown that a teenager’s troubles in relationships with classmates are directly due to an important feature of age - the formation of moral and ethical criteria for assessing a peer and related specific requirements for his behavior. In the works of T. P. Gavrilova and V. N. Lozovtseva, it is noted that the personality qualities of their peers that appeal to adolescents, in principle, do not differ from the qualities that attract them in adults, and the decisive importance for them is, firstly, moral qualities, in which the attitude towards a person in general and a comrade in particular is expressed, and, secondly, a specific complex of strong-willed traits and physical advantages that make up a kind of “ideal of masculinity” of a teenager. Not only boys, but also girls want to be brave, persistent, and have a strong character. Boys also value physical strength. The presence or absence of these qualities in a teenager largely determines his authority in the team, his well-being in personal relationships, and, finally, whether he becomes a model for his classmates or not.

Studying a group of teenagers in the same class for three years, psychologists found that children who were not accepted by their classmates, along with various unattractive characteristics, suffered from one common drawback - a lack of a sense of camaraderie. This deficiency is not compensated for by anything in the eyes of teenagers, so even an excellent student (or a good athlete) can find himself alone.

The most important norms of this “code” are equality, honesty, respect, loyalty, and helping a friend. Teenagers aged 11–12 years unanimously condemn their peers who do not comply with the requirement to “behave as equals” and who oppose themselves to the team. At the same time, teenagers greatly value the ability to stand up for themselves, and the desire to protect themselves with the help of adults is condemned.

Mastering the norms of friendship is a child’s most important acquisition during adolescence. Therefore, one of the main pedagogical measures to overcome conflicts is to create such objective conditions in the team, when every teenager will be faced with the need to develop the qualities of a good comrade, a true collectivist. Psychologists have found that good results come from joint activities and the conflicting parties experiencing the success of their common activities. It is important to note that the high moral meaning of joint activities is of decisive importance. In addition, the organized activity must be meaningful for the team and correspond to the capabilities of the adolescents included in it.

The main factors that determine the characteristics of conflicts between students have been identified. We will give a description of these factors, following A. Ya. Antsupov:
“Firstly, the specifics of conflicts between schoolchildren are determined by developmental psychology. The age of students has a significant influence both on the causes of conflicts, as well as on the characteristics of their development and methods of completion.
It is known that during schooling there is a stage of the most intensive development of a person. School covers a significant part of childhood, all of adolescence and early adolescence. Conflicts among schoolchildren differ markedly from conflicts among adults. There are also significant differences in the conflicts that occur in primary, junior high and secondary schools.

Secondly, the characteristics of conflicts between schoolchildren are determined by the nature of their activities at school, the main content of which is study. Psychologist A. V. Petrovsky developed the concept of activity-based mediation of interpersonal relationships. He emphasizes the determining influence on the system of interpersonal relations in a group and team of the content, goals and values ​​of joint activities. Interpersonal relationships in student and teaching teams differ markedly from relationships in teams and groups of other types. These differences are largely due to the specifics of the pedagogical process in a comprehensive school.

Thirdly, the specifics of conflicts between rural school students in modern conditions are determined by the current way of life in rural areas, the socio-economic situation that has developed today...” The school is an integral and important structural element of society. From parents, students learn about the main difficulties that adults face. From many other sources, schoolchildren know about various life problems, experience them in their own way, and project these problems onto relationships with peers and teachers.

A study conducted under the leadership of V.I. Zhuravlev in schools in the Moscow region made it possible to identify some features of conflicts and related phenomena in student relationships.
Student-student conflicts arise in the following situations:
due to insults, gossip, envy, denunciations - 11%;
due to lack of mutual understanding – 7%;
in connection with the struggle for leadership – 7%;
due to the opposition between the student’s personality and the team – 7%;
in connection with social work – 6%;
in girls - because of a boy - 5%.
11% believe that students had no conflicts.

How do schoolchildren react to these conflicts? It turned out that 61% of schoolchildren experienced a feeling of hatred towards their classmates.

This indicates that not all is well in the relationships between classmates at school. The main reasons for hatred towards peers:
meanness and betrayal – 30%;
fawning, the existence of “fake” excellent students and teachers’ favorites – 27%;
personal grievance – 15%;
lies and arrogance – 12%;
rivalry between classmates – 9%.

Students’ conflict levels are significantly influenced by their individual psychological characteristics, in particular aggressiveness. The presence of aggressive students in the class increases the likelihood of conflicts not only with their participation, but also without them - between other members of the class team. Schoolchildren’s opinions about the causes of aggression and the occurrence of conflicts are as follows:
reason for aggression: “desire to stand out” among peers – 12%;
source of aggression: “heartlessness and cruelty of adults” – 11%;
“everything depends on the relationships in the class” – 9.5%;
“the family is to blame” for the student’s aggressiveness – 8%;
aggressive schoolchildren – children with mental disabilities – 4%;
aggressiveness is an age-related phenomenon associated with excess energy – 1%;
“aggressiveness is a bad character trait” – 1%;
“there were aggressive students in the class” – 12%;
“there were no aggressive students in the class” – 34.5%.

Conflicts between students at school arise, among other things, due to misconduct and violation of generally accepted norms of behavior. Violation of these norms, as a rule, leads to infringement of someone's interests. A clash of interests is the basis for conflict. Schoolchildren, in their own opinion, most often commit the following violations of behavioral norms at school:
smoking – 50%;
consumption of alcoholic beverages – 44%;
rudeness, rudeness in communication – 31%;
use of obscene language – 26.5%;
false – 15%;
students’ disrespect for each other – 13%;
sexual promiscuity – 10%;
petty theft – 10%;
fights – 10%;
hooliganism – 10%;
drug addiction – 6%;
bullying of the younger and weaker – 6%;
gambling for money – 3%.

The peculiarities of conflicts between school students are determined, first of all, by the specifics of the age-related psychology of children, adolescents and young men (girls). The emergence, development and completion of conflicts are significantly influenced by the nature of the educational process and its organization in a particular educational institution. The third factor influencing conflicts in student relationships is the way of life and the existing socio-economic situation.